new journal:

pinchmepretty

i love you all so add it fuckers

I havent updated this in a while considering I have been grounded cause I got my progress report for school and I'm failing 4 classes. I don't really know what the fucks been going on, I can't seem to care anymore, about anything. I have told practically all my friends to piss off and leave me alone and it sucks because I was already extremely lonely when I had my 3 friends but now I have like one friend who only calls me when she needs something. I keep crying for the stupidest reasons at the most random times. Like last night I was in the shower shaving and all the sudden I felt sooo shitty and I couldn't stop crying. and i just keep thinking whats the point of me living? i have absolutely no reason to get out off bed in the morning and everyday is the fucking same. i can't fucking take it anymore. i need someone to talk to like really talk to. someone who will actually listen not like my asshole bitch (ex) friends.

im so goddamn lonely. i used to have hope that things would get better and that i was just going through a rough spot. then i realized my whole goddamn life has been a rough spot and things just keep getting worse no matter how damn hard i try to change them. i have almost lost all of my emotions but the one that has stayed is my self pity. all i do is wallow in it. god i just wish i knew what the hell i am supposed to do. the first thing im going to do when i get a car is i am going to fill up the tank, get on the freeway and drive. just drive forever and never come back. leave everyone and everything behind.